Crazy shit happens all the time! (I)

My friend Elizabeth was a little firecracker. She went to puces de lignancourt to buy some magical liquid. It was unavoidable; It not only took half the neighborhood with it, it left generations thinking, because she was freaking high!
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The man in the third phonebooth on the right at the jack off room in a gay bar was playing kikball. He was sitting with his girlfriend, a little pig, dressed in a pink dress looking like Miss piggy, because they were afraid to be caught, obviously the cops didn't know they were about to do it but eventually they'd discovered.
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Emma was a very happy cow in their lover's bedroom. She was stealing candy from as many small children as possible in 28 minutes, with a bunch of alcoholics, in a land before time but still in time so not really before it but amidst the cycle of age progression, because she stole some magic mushrooms from Stevy.
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Arnold Schwarzenegger was hidden in the kitchen cupboard scrubbing his ass with a toothbrush with San Claus' top elf because they ate all the cookies before church.
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A fire marker was in an isolated island and at the side of our hero stood a youth of but tender age, with that one that your mother should know, when my wife is cleaning my underwears that it's to say, at the same hour everyday, because he couldn't stand licking more chocolate cake.